


Train Wreck

by Mouseykitty



Category: haikyuu
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Depression, Dysphoria, Group Chat is involved, Inarizaki, Mentions of Miya Twins - Freeform, Nonbinary Character, Other, Reader is feeling down, Suna Rintarou is best partner, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-06
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-12 10:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29882898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mouseykitty/pseuds/Mouseykitty
Summary: It's a bad day for you, luckily Suna Rintarou is a good partner.
Kudos: 1





	Train Wreck

**Author's Note:**

> This was written in the middle of a bad day. Writing this managed to cheer me up, maybe this will help someone too.

You lay curled on your bed, blankets pulled over your head to block out the bright sunlight of dawn. You had not moved since you awoke at two in the morning, it was currently noon judging from the sounds emanating from the kitchen and living areas of your house. Voices echoed from all directions, dictating people the opposite of you; they were preparing for the day while you had yet to muster the energy or motivation to tap the screen of your phone to view the days' updates.  
Right then your phone vibrated with an incoming call, you knew who it was without having to look at the caller ID not like you could anyway. Once the person calling left a voice message-a rarity for them-quicker buzzes followed. The group chat. You also knew what they were texting each other about. You knew that was the reason they called you. Yet you could not shift your fingers those few inches to the device, could not provide them false affirmations of a happy person, could not do anything but wallow in all the thoughts blasting their ways through your fragile defenses.  
As a result, you curled tighter, holding in whimpers of mental pain nobody would ever begin to understand. How thoughts from your own mind could debilitate you to such a degree you were incapable of actions beyond breathing-you had to remind yourself to take slow deep breaths.  
Again, your phone went off, trilling its way through those thoughts. Again, you let it go to voice mail. Sooner or later, they would finally leave you by yourself. You just had to deal with them trying to get your attention. Instead, you closed your eyes, slowed your breathing, let yourself drift into the abyss.  
You came to the feeling of eyes watching you; in turn, you curled tighter, hoping they would go away like they always did. You closed your hands around your ears, pressing tighter and tighter with every roaring thought. The voices always went away eventually. Your eyes were screwed shut; mouth pinched in phantom pain. _Please go away. Please leave me alone. Please please pleaseplease.  
_Arms wrapped around you, pulling you into a firm chest you would know anywhere. Even in the midst of an episode.  
You were so lost in yourself you did not realize those eyes were real, they belonged to the one person who would always be there for you. You did not feel them sit behind you on the bed, did not hear their sighs at your pain. Did not see the pain that flashed through their eyes, did not hear the thoughts running through their head. They had hoped the episode wasn’t going to be this bad, had hoped you would react to them once they came into your room like they always did. They had prayed you would answer his calls, though they knew your episodes could be bad you usually managed to swipe your finger across that screen, tap the speaker icon, and listen to them even if you couldn’t speak.  
So, they went to your house once their teammates pointed out you hadn’t responded to them for over twelve hours. They-as a unit-agreed to give you time if you went without replying to their texts, so they waited with bated breath. Morning practice passed with no word from you. Lunch was silent. By the end of the day, they knew it was time to intervene. Once after school practice ended the team had sent them your way, knowing they would be the only one you’d respond to.  
Now, they lay with your curled into their body, arms wrapped around them like ivy as you pushed your head into their chest. They did not speak, instead choosing to hum deeply in their chest. They knew you did not respond well to words when like this, knew gentle sounds-such as the humming-would soothe you in a way speaking did not. You would speak in your own time; they would not rush you into feeling ready to talk about what triggered this bad of an episode.  
They pushed their face into your hair, mouth curling in languid pleasure; you smelled like them. You told them your scent helped ground you, they always felt proud they could help you from falling completely without being there physically. They tightened their hold on you, pushing their face deeper into your hair, nuzzling strands of hair.  
Slowly, you uncurled your body, choosing to intertwine your legs with theirs. Your breathing calmed naturally without you prompting breathing exercises. Your arms loosened from their constricting hold; your jaw relaxed; you melted into them without the urgency of before. You hummed back, matching their pitch perfectly. When they nuzzled you, you hummed louder.  
Eventually, those thoughts ceased for the moment, finally silenced in the presence of your anchor. All around you was their scent, it ensconced every bit of you until you were unable to smell anything else. You still couldn’t talk, but you could reach for your phone, joints creaking as you stretched your arm for the first time since the previous night. You unlocked your phone, tapped on the group chat, sent them reassurances that while you weren’t completely recovered you were getting there. You sent them endless apologies for ignoring them, when they told you to stop apologizing for something you could not control you bit your lip. They were gentle with telling you to quit apologizing, it was not their fault your mind twisted what they meant.  
Your phone was gently pulled from your hands, you saw long fingers effortlessly tapping away at your screen. They were probably telling the team you were spiraling again; they always did that for you. They were telling the team you were weak, telling them you were worthless. They were finally going to break up with you, finally, leave you like you knew they were going to. You were too clingy, too demanding of them when you were like this. They were disgusted by you and your body, you made them feel dirty for liking someone like you. They were just like everyone else, they always left once you started relying on them.  
Tears ran down your cheeks, whimpering escaping your throat. You silently mouthed please, _please don’t leave me. Please don’t. I’m sorry. Please.  
_Their arms instantly encircled you again, crushing you to their chest. This time they spoke, knowing you need to hear their words.  
“I’ll never leave you. Nothing you could do would ever make me leave you. I’m here, let it out. I love you. I love you. I’m in love with you. I will be here for you.” The words were disjointed, yet they helped to soothe you.  
You tightened your hold on them, cried into his hoodie. You told them why you were like this, told them what caused this bad of an episode. In turn, they reassured you that they love you, they loved you not what your body looked like. They told you they were glad you hung on for so long, that you didn’t end everything when you felt like you could not handle more of what the world had in store for you. You may not have been waiting for them, but they were glad you didn’t let yourself fall too far.  
You fell asleep-peaceful rest-to them whispering what they loved about you, how much they loved you. That hum emanating from their chest lulled you to sleep. Before drifting off completely you whispered into their chest. Their arms tightened, pressed their face back into your hair, feeling their warm cheeks and shy smile.  
_I love you, too, Suna Rintarou._____

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End file.
